Originally from Selena Silver's Forum

But choking... just makes me go huh. Honestly, I don't even see it as a sexual act at all. *shrug*

I think that the porn-studs do this so often because the porn-girls really, really like it. I love it in my personal life, and I like watching it in porn. I think this is a very feminine response. The man is demonstrating his potential strength in a very tender way, and the woman is accepting and submitting to his physical domination. This type of dominance/submission is primal. Ever watch lions mate on a nature program? The male holds the female down, grips her neck in his jaws, and she submits to him. She knows he could hurt her, but because he uses such great care and restraint, she knows that he won't hurt her or her offspring.

In my personal life, this is the most tender sexual act between me and my husband. I feel most feminine, and feel he's most masculine, when we play out this primitive ritual. For me this is very different than submitting to rougher demonstrations of male strength. To me, there's a huge difference between submitting to forced gagging, name-calling, and humiliation, and to being choked.

The choking is a form of restraint. It's in the same category as holding a woman's hands behind her back, holding her legs open, pinning her with body weight, gripping her hair, etc. It's another way (the ultimate way) for the man to restrain and physically control his mate. Submitting to that, leaving one's throat unprotected, is the ultimate demonstration of a woman's acceptance and trust. None of these domination holds are painful, and they're performed with such care and control that the woman actually feels very safe and secure. In fact, I feel downright warm and fuzzy when my husband does this to me.

Oft times the male performer will wrap a hand around a girl's throat, and angle his thumb and forefinger under her jaw. This allows him to control her head, to tilt it to his desired angle for eye-contact (or lack thereof), kissing, whatever. In another forum where I talk sexuality with a diverse group of women, nearly all of us love this. We like seeing it in porn, and we like reading it in romantic erotic novels. It really is a very tender act, and due to the deep primal chord it strikes in the female body, it's a definite turn-on.

All the other stuff guys do to dominate girls in porn--calling them names, slapping them, pushing their heads in toilets, whatever--are unnatural. This is true play-acting. No male animal would be permitted to procreate by a female he treated thus. Only humans treat eachother that way in the name of fun. Those acts touch a unique place in the psyche. However neck holds, arm holds, hair holds, etc are all acts of natural mating, so they go straight to the core of a girl's femininity and sexuality. It makes a girl feel like a woman, and it makes her appreciate the control a man exerts over his superior physical strength.

It's likely that a lot of male porn viewers see choking as an act of humiliation; as mock violence. Women, on the other hand (those in my association, anyway), see it as an act of tenderness. I see it on an even deeper level. I see it as a mating ritual. It doesn't make the woman weak. Even the alpha-female submits to the alpha-male in a wolf pack.

Anyway, I'm certain that many porn-girls actually really enjoy neck holds, along with other forms of physical restraint. That might be why you see it so often in porn.

Originally posted by Renee Pornero
Ich muß zugeben, dass ich lange auf einem Experimentier-Trip war und on camera so gut wie alles ausprobiert habe, was für mich noch okay erschien. Es war für mich einfach eine gute Gelegenheit, Dinge auszuprobieren, ohne Gefahr zu laufen, dass mir dabei gleich etwas passiert...

Was diese Rough Sex Sache anbelangt, habe ich da schon etwas für mich entdeckt, definitv. Ich steh auf Choking, Slapping, Throatfucking etc., solange es im Rahmen bleibt und mache es auch privat sehr gerne. Aber wie gesagt, alles hat seine Grenzen und wenn ich keine Luft mehr bekomme, hat auch das Vergnügen ein Ende.

Originally posted by Renee Pornero
Gegen einstweiligen Kuschelsex spricht übrigens auch nichts!